With little time to spare we had to get the gear sorted, figure out the how and what aspects of the shoot and make a few personal choices about getting a hot shower…ok so there’s no water let alone hot water so forget that part for another...week...or maybe tuck into yet another package of granola…(can’t stare at another blueberry floating in powdered milk) or simply don a set of clean clothes which is absolutely pointless out here. No one cares and soon neither will you. All of us are in a “winner take all” competition of who can wear their shirt the longest, which for the record...today is the seventh day without washing - not just our clothes but just about everything with all of us looking fairly worse for wear. But given there isn’t enough water in the community for them to prepare their food properly or for the children to enjoy a glass of cool, clean water there was no way we were we going to waste it on washing our clothes. So you brush the dust off a little bit and decide to leave the clothes you slept in last night - woke up in this morning - on for a few more days...no one seems to notice.
It’s just that the fine grained red desert sands are blowing against you constantly and that between all of the kneeling or sitting on the ground to make images or getting in or out of the vehicle you just end up covered in the talcum powder fine – red dirt. If that’s not enough it sticks to the sweat running down your face, your sunburned neck and arms soaked in sun block and Jungle Juice with every entry and exit to the land cruiser resulting in clouds of dust...enveloping you…it’s never ending – finding it’s way into every crease and crevice on your body with exposed cameras covered in red silt…
Along with the dirt and the dust - a constant companion out here is fatigue. Your work is nowhere and everywhere at the same time – it’s in the people, in the landscape of an enormously vast, open and empty desert or a volcanic rock field, it’s in their children’s smiles and it’s in their tears…all endless fragments or wisps of photographic chance that summon you to pay attention in hopes that you will see an image that will make a difference, one which will speak to others about the need of others and while you’re operating on little sleep you know that the maximum physical and maximum creative effort is still expected. Others equally hardened by up-close years in the field...expect results – need results and you expect this from yourself as well...
Through all of this you have to force yourself to pay attention, to stay awake in searching the landscape for it’s hidden gems – blurred visuals punctuated by the endless rhythm of tires winding their way through the desert sand with all of the responsibility and the purpose of the journey constantly running through your mind. The oppressive heat, high humidity and the endless kilometers of rough roads turn your guts upside down...yet you ignore it as much as you can and find that you adapt quite well - becoming accustomed to the constant state of feeling lousy with a mutual disregard of the physical toll it all has on tearing your body down. Before long you drift in and out and away…to someplace other than the conditions you find yourself in and your brain feeds you mirage like images of a hot shower and a clean bed and sounds of the people you’ve left behind – all of these thoughts become your constant companion...
And when you stare out the open window of the land cruiser, watching the heat waves dance up from the desert floor and mile high dust devils tearing across the scorched earth…the vehicle motion blends with the blurs whipping past your eyes - you quietly surrender to the assault. In some off beat way, you have to ignore all of the inconvenience so that you can pay attention to the very reason you’re out here - for me anyway and that's to create images of consequence that will maybe bring those that want to help just a little bit closer to those which are in the greatest of need. It's that simple. It's not about me or this photographer or about a particular aid organization or NGO - it's about the people. Just like you and me, at times...they need a bit of help to make their way through the tough aspects of life and in this I have found over my decades worth of service that all of us...have a role to play for good.
No comments:
Post a Comment